"When they saw him, they worshiped him; BUT SOME DOUBTED!"
How can this be? These are the ones who saw Jesus feed thousands with a few small fish and loaves of bread. They were there when Jesus healed and stilled the storm (wind). They not only witnessed Jesus rebuking demons and saw those demons leave, but they were given power themselves to cast out demons and heal as Jesus sent them out. They saw Jesus violently killed, and then for 40 days (according to Acts 1) saw the resurrected Jesus eat food and teach them. And yet they still had doubt. I wonder when this went away?
Maybe the better question is, "When did their faith kick in and they saw what was happening through different eyes?" Perhaps it was when the Holy Spirit was sent to them. But the Holy Spirit didn't keep them from disobedience or fear or other emotions that must have occurred on their journeys. Maybe it was when they actually stepped out to do the mission God called them to do. Maybe there were other events and meetings in their personal spiritual development that brought this doubting to an end. Or just maybe this doubting was a constant fight when God didn't do what they wanted him to do in the timing they wanted it done?
I am not sure I would doubt after seeing the things they saw and hearing the things they heard. But then again, maybe if they experienced what I experienced in my life 2000 years later, the disciples would wonder why I have times of doubt. Perhaps we simply need to acknowledge times of doubt and realize that these doubts that comes to us do not change the truth of Jesus, but signifies our fear and lack of trust in what Jesus has told us.
In spite of their doubts, the disciples still worshiped Jesus and still followed his mission. And they became ferocious in fulfilling the Great Commission, most of them giving their very lives in order share the gospel of Jesus Christ. Doubt becomes an issue when it paralyzes us. The disciples doubt didn't do that. We cannot allow our doubt to keep us out of the battle or away from our mission.
2 comments:
I also believe that doubt comes from Satan himself as well. Satan hates when we fully trust ourselves, as well as our actions and words to Jesus Christ. He will do anything to keep the Truth from surfacing, and one of the most powerful ways he cripples our effectiveness in living out the Truth is by instilling doubt and question into our thoughts. The only way to combat this battle is to arm ourselves with the Truth. To know it in our minds and to reherse that each and every day through our thoughts, actions and words. Sometimes the best way that I feel I can combat my doubts is by fighting them with the Truth I have read in the Bible. What a peace we have in today's generation that we can read those truths and speak on them ourselves. This past Easter, I read through the gospels and thought a lot about the doubts these people must have had towards Jesus himself. They probably couldn't believe their eyes when they saw the many miracles that He had done, miracles they never saw anyone else in their time perform (the multiple times Jesus told others that they wer forgiven was such a controversy for the Pharisees.) It was a "revolution" in a sense, compared to the teachings from what the spiritual leaders of their time were proclaiming. I could see how easily it must have been for them to wonder what exactly was happening, because they did not see what we see 2000 years later. We see a Christ that has resurrected. They saw the acts of Christ without knowing what some of his parables really meant. I think a lot of times today, I can relate that questioning/doubt to when I wonder if what I think God is calling me to do on a specific situation is really God or our own answers we are creating on God's behalf. Just some thoughts I wanted to share...
Great thoughts. Thanks Beth.
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